May 16, 2005

A New York First

POST #    1710

It's not often that I experience firsts in New York anymore. After 27 years, how many things haven't you seen? Sunday afternoon, I experienced a first. I was entering the Nassau Avenue stop of the G train at the Norman Avenue entrance. On the stairs, I saw a large pile of human feces. I should say, what I assume was human feces as I didn't really try to inspect it. I just held my breath, hurried past the pile and tried to get through the turnstile as quickly as possible.

Obviously, I've seen plenty of shit on the streets, but that's dog shit. I can say that I've never seen human shit anywhere outside a bathroom in New York. Some of you might be thinking, "you need to get out more because I see the big deuce all the time on the streets." Well, if you have, I guess you're lucky and I'm not.

What's more flabbergasting is that there was no paper to be seen around the shit. Did the shitter not have the time or the materials to wipe up? Or were they courteous enough to dispose of their wipingings in the garbage can. And how bad did the shitter have to go in order to drop trou right there on the stairs? If it was explosive diarrhea, I would understand a little better, but solid crap? Can't you hold it until you get home or find a store?

As disturbing as this sounds, I think it might have been better if the shit was actually fresh. A steaming pile of fresh shit is better than a festering pile of fly attracting shit. Of course, no shit at all would be best. I feel bad for the guy that has to clean that mess. Unless it's still there.

Posted by tien mao in NYC at 7:43 AM

 

 

Obviously following the advice of Ms. Subways:

(credit)

Posted by: Dan Dickinson [TypeKey Profile Page] at May 16, 2005 8:30 AM

*giggling uncontrollably*

Posted by: Maine at May 16, 2005 9:55 AM

while my family was visiting at christmas time, we were at atlantic ave waiting for the 2 train. i looked at my sister, and pointed and said, "that looks like shit." i didnt think it actually was... but indeed. human shit on the 2 train platform.

Posted by: christina at May 16, 2005 10:01 AM

I cant believe you actually did think about it! I was laughting out loud while reading this.

it is obvious that the person who did it is a bit crazy, and if he/she is as insane enough to do that on the stairs, does not care about toilet paper.


unrelated: you havent post any info about your "new" house furniture

ok bye!

Posted by: mary b at May 16, 2005 10:03 AM

seen it in the 4th ave station of the F. yuck.

Posted by: dahl at May 16, 2005 11:42 AM

while living in berkeley, ca, saw (multiple times) homeless people defecating on street. too liberal for me.

Posted by: yp at May 16, 2005 12:25 PM

While riding my bike by Yankee Stadium yesterday I startled a woman relieving herself (couldn't tell if it was #1 or #2) in some bushes facing the Major Deegan.

Posted by: joe at May 16, 2005 1:58 PM

wow, I'm so glad there isn't a photo attached to this post...

Posted by: neps at May 16, 2005 8:27 PM

I'd have to say seeing solid crap is probably better than explosive D on the platform. I saw a dog on the sidewalk with explosive D, and I almost wanted to stay to make sure the kid walking him would scoop the droopy poop up. Almost.

Posted by: Jen at May 16, 2005 9:28 PM

On a related note, I was on the F train last weekend where a drunk was sleeping in the car. He got up, tried to open the door between the cars (not realizing that the F train doors are locked) then proceeded to sit down, whip out his wang, and piss on the floor of the car. I then spent the rest of the ride watching his urine run up and down the length of the car, being stepped in and out by unknowing passengers.

So for all of you F train folk, that ain't always Gatorade....

Posted by: Rocknrope at May 18, 2005 8:06 PM

I saw some old drunk polish guys pissing on a streetlamp on my very mellow block... guess that's part of the charm of living in european greenpoint.

Posted by: liberal server at May 24, 2005 3:03 PM

years ago, in the waning moments before Hell's Kitchen become Clinton, I saw a guy making his morning constitutional right on 46th street off 8th avenue (hello Restaurant Row!) No sooner did he buckle his pants when a couple of Guardian Angels walk by (remember them?). They see what he's done and they proceed to direct him, in no uncertain terms, "Pick that shit up!" And he did.

Guardian Angels indeed.

Posted by: sissy martini at June 16, 2005 3:05 PM

Always, always in the back entrance of the bergen st. F/G stop, the brooklyn bound side. And that station always smells like raw sewage anyway, so what's the difference I guess?

Posted by: merkin at June 16, 2005 4:58 PM

I recently found a pile of dreck in a semi-secluded place in the 75th Avenue Manhattan bound F platform. At least it was at the end of the platform, behind the stairs. I think it took a few days to clean it up but there is still a stain.

I once saw a pile of poop on one of those end of the train 2-seaters. Beat that!

Posted by: Danielle at June 17, 2005 8:31 PM

Yeah, the 15th St/Prospect Park stop on the F line, there is sometimes a big pile of human crap on the stairs... as if someone made a crude toilet by sitting on the step above, who knows.

Posted by: JT at June 21, 2005 10:18 AM

Check out the 70th & CPW entrance to the B/C. More often than not there are a few turds near the vending machine.

And public restrooms are only a few blocks away...

Posted by: JoeM at June 21, 2005 10:58 AM

I saw a crazy man pooing across from the Virgin Megastore at Union Square in that little patch of park about two years ago. And no, it was not really in the bushes. Nast.

Posted by: smitty at June 21, 2005 11:06 AM

when i lived in cambridge, i walked out of my triple decker and saw a guy shitting on my house, literally right by the first floor bedroom window (luckily I lived on the 2nd floor). I was going to yell "stop it", but I mean I didn't want him coming over and shitting on me, so i just went to work and had a good story to tell.

Posted by: bray bray at July 20, 2006 12:41 PM

this summer someone's been dropping trou from time to time (and dropping something else) along the brooklyn bridge pedestrian walkway in one of the dainty stone niches near the nice tourist plaques.

Posted by: stinky-poo at July 20, 2006 1:22 PM

I hope that this post doesn't inspire the follow-up to the new photo book out from powerHouse called "Pees on Earth" (http://www.powerhousebooks.com/titless06/peesonearth.html).

Posted by: Matthew Caldecutt at July 20, 2006 4:24 PM

I once got on an uptown-bound 2 train at 34th Street and saw the other passengers holding their noses and pointing. Yep, someone had left a fresh pile in one of the seats near the door. I guess he or she exited the train while I was entering.

On an equally disturbing note, a couple of winters ago I encountered a woman, her pants around her ankles, who was defecating in front of ABC Carpet near Union Square. I quickly crossed the street to get away from her as she called after me, fishwife-style, "Ah, get away from me, you! Go on, go on!" I complied.

Posted by: Annulla at July 24, 2006 5:44 PM

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