July 17, 2003


POST #    228

an excerpt from jim caple's article on racing in the sausage race:

And can you picture Simon had he gone to trial and actually been sentenced to prison?

FELON 1: "Hey, buddy, what are you in for?"

FELON 2: "Armed robbery and aggravated assault. What about you?"

FELON 1: "First-degree murder. How about you, new guy?"

SIMON: "Errr, ummmmmm, well, it's a little embarrassing. ... I beat the sausage."

[Long uncomfortable pause.]

FELON 2: "Didn't the Supreme Court just rule that that wasn't illegal anymore?"

Posted by tien mao in Sports at 4:23 PM



From my brother...

Top Ten Excuses Of The Baseball Player Who Beat Up The Sausage

10. "There hasn't been a good bizarre ballpark attack in a while"

9. "Always wanted to be on Marv Albert's blooper reel"

8. "Looking to land a big endorsement deal with Jimmy Dean"

7. "It's not whether you win or lose, it's how you blindside the opposing team's costumed racing mascot"

6. "It was a Brewers-Pirates game. Somebody had to liven things up"

5. "The bratwurst gave me fifty dollars to take down the sausage"

4. "I guess I misunderstood the Atkins diet"

3. "When a giant sausage is running at you -- you act on instinct"

2. "Pete Rose bet me I wouldn't"

1. "Who doesn't 'pound the sausage' every once in a while"

Posted by: rachelle at July 17, 2003 6:58 PM

yeah, i saw that on the letterman site.

Posted by: tien at July 17, 2003 7:17 PM

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